Viet Nam 
English She’s only in the middle of undergrad now, and even at that I dont think she quite gets how hard med school is compared to undergrad. I’ve only really spoken to her about the preclinical at this site years so far. We’ve discussed marriage and moving in together, so I’d imagine she’d move with me in a heartbeat if it meant I’d have a paid position like a medical residency.
Incredible Amounts of Stress
The foundation of trust can be shaken in a long-distance relationship. You cannot understand the circumstances of your better half living in a different place. It is entirely different from living in the same city. Being in a relationship, you have to take care of each other and care for each other’s feelings. The second of the stages of a long distance relationship is talking about the distance and what you will do about it.
You will, as most military couples do, learn to both love and hate Skype.
Making sure you’re in a good place to begin a relationship and keeping the lines of communication open will make it easier to balance medical school and a relationship. During the first two years, you are constantly studying and making sure you are passing (and hopefully acing!) all your exams. Then there’s USMLE Step 1… Then during the third year, you are in the hospital or clinic every day and THEN you come home and study.
Long-distance romance can present unique challenges and roadblocks. Long-distance relationships may often require additional effort to be successful — especially when challenges arise. Having special names for each other reserved only for one another are heart-warming. Hearing that one word with love lifts our spirits up, and we feel assured all over again. Talking about family and friends gives you more matters to talk about.
I don’t know how many times I had to rely on nurses to help me, but I will forever be grateful for their kindness as co-workers. Many people who are just beginning a career in medicine are also at the stage of starting a family, whether it be starting a serious relationship, getting married, or having children. Our partners may be chasing serious career goals as well. Problems arise when these career goals clash. Although this may be a con for the actual medical student/resident, everyone in the family is excited to have a person to field all of their medical questions.
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My time at AUC has been quite a worldwide adventure, studying two years of Basic Sciences on the island, then completing my clinical rotations in the US as well as the UK. I completed my family medicine residency at Mercer University School of Medicine / Navicent Health in Macon, Georgia. Today, I am a board-certified family physician practicing outpatient family medicine in Macon, Georgia. I hope you enjoy my site as I share with you my journey. Thanks for visiting Diary of a Caribbean Med Student!
But right now, their mandate is to survive medschool and graduate and become successful. Love life is not of their priority right now, same as mine but I’m trying to busy myself too to catch up to her. Learn how to effectively thrive in medical school even with the significant time constraints that come with serious relationships and children. When the conversations are stuck on the minutia of specific medical practices and terminology, it can make a non-medical partner feel like an outsider. The solution here is to be patient but also clear to your partner if you feel uncomfortable or continually left out.
It’s also important to prioritize your medical school friendships. There’s no substitute for the support of someone who knows exactly what you are going through, and having that network will help you avoid burdening your partner with 100% of your medical school stress. Maybe your partner lives in a different time zone and is getting ready for bed when you’re just starting your day. Maybe they work the first shift, while you work the third. Or perhaps one partner simply has a more jam-packed schedule than the other. You might also want to consider seeking the help of a mental health professional if you’re experiencing challenges like anxiety, trauma, or a personality disorder.
Whether you find yourself among civilians or married military couples, you often feel like you don’t really belong anywhere. Your civilian friends will never understand — and they often won’t want to understand, either — the difficulties specifically felt by people involved with the military. Unless they grew up around military members, they couldn’t. Then there’s those military families that have years of experience under their belt — they married into it, grew up with it, and otherwise knew way more about it than you. They have kids, they have base housing, they know their way in and out and through the military like I would know my way through a video game. Nothing makes me feel as self-conscious as being around people who have years of experience over me.
The fear of having your loved one getting shipped off to the other side of the world and never coming back isn’t a worry that hangs over their head every day. The most successful relationships in med school are between two people who are equally busy. While it’s nice to do things like washing a load of laundry for your partner when he’s busy, it helps when your schedule demands that you’re gone most of the time as well.
Talk to your partner about what you need to be successful in school and how that might impact your relationship. I try to stay as busy as possible with friends & family. If possible I’d recommend moving in together if your relationship is at that point. We met in college and he also had a gap year so our relationship foundation was thankfully pretty solid pre Med school.
The emotion of possessiveness should not be confused with the emotion of trust. If you can ignore these things, you have a way ahead with your long-distance partner. Something’s just trying to kill their time by going out, so do not feel ignored as they are going through a lot too. Hi Kate, honestly it really depends on each relationship as each person and couple has a different level of what they expect, and how much communication they’re comfortable with. And this may be different depending on your age, culture, and generation too.
Usually, a long-distance relationship begins when you have to move out due to your job, education, or any other financial reason. Be clear, be consistent and be communicative to your partner because you have to face so many problems communicating to each other to fill out the gap of not meeting face to face. They talk to each other, and if they like each other, they start to date.
